So you’ve joined your organizations, found the niche you’re comfortable in, everybody is happy and … you realize that you aren’t quite sure how to balance each persona that you portray at each event. You are running from chapter meeting in your heels, to your optimistic and perky job as a tour guide, to your class arguing about LGBT rights and you’re wondering … how am I supposed to break down gender binaries while being involved in an organization (Greek Life), that only supports the thought that there are two genders?

To expand on this, I am a gender rights activist, someone who believes in breaking down gender stereotypes or even the opinion that there are only two genders (male and female). However, I am involved in an organization that draws a distinct line between male and female, and as a sorority woman I am expected to be the face of that sorority. My behavior is supposed to be classy, exhibit high morals, wear high heels and dresses, and to emphasize my femininity. In contrast, there is a separate set of expectations for fraternity men. These separate expectations directly contradict the part of me that is an activist for same expectations for all people. How do I handle this?

I call it “identity morphing.” I present myself differently to all of the people I am around, and the aspect of my persona that I am expected to portray at that moment. It does not mean that I am “being myself,” but rather only showing a specific facet of myself. It does begin to raise the question, however, should we be compromising who we are as a whole, in order to fit into our surroundings?

Sincerely,

Anonymous